


Visitations

by bigcatsandkatanas



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-12 05:33:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11730537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigcatsandkatanas/pseuds/bigcatsandkatanas
Summary: Anon RequestSasha takes Eugene's pill early and dies in her cell before going to Alexandria with Negan. This change of events sends a ripple effect of Negan's PTSD being triggered, leading him to fall apart and turn against his own people.





	Visitations

**Author's Note:**

> fanart was provided to me by the anon so all the credit goes to them. thanks for reading, apologies for any typos.

There’s quiet moments sometimes. White noise ringing in his ears, like the aftermath of an explosion without the explosion.

_Where’s that game face?_

Negan sat at the edge of his bed staring straight at nothing. It hadn’t been that long since he learned about everything, since Sasha came in guns blazing sending him straight to his feet ready for anything to happen. Now there was just silence.

Everyone was wide awake for good reason. But Sasha was in her cell now. She was strong, silent, unapologetic. All things that impressed him. He contemplated the future she’d have at the sanctuary, all she’d have to say was yes. She was his before she even knew it, he already had some ideas of how she was another puzzle piece he was looking for. Eugene was useful and she was certainly a fighter. Not since Arat had he seen a woman that had the fire to compete and obliterate all the other boys in his army. Gun smoke and sweat and spit. Sasha put up a fight before she was restrained, it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his life.  

Instead of going straight to his bedroom he had taken a detour to the harem. The wives were frightened understandably. Negan reassured them. He said everything was fine, they weren’t convinced so he took two to bed.

It should have been enough for him but it wasn’t. It never really was. Negan was on a constant quest for more, when more wouldn’t suffice—well—he’d find something else to conquer. There was never any real peace, his own ambition was swallowing him whole, leading to some bad decisions, even if he couldn’t openly admit it. But he had his doubts.

Rick had fucked him over, there was no way around it. The fact stirred him, affected him more than it should have. Bad call. He thought smashing a couple heads would have done the job. But he really did go that extra mile, go out of his way to convince him he wasn’t a monster. There were rules. Rules Rick and his people needed to abide by but for fucks sake they couldn’t even do that right could they?

At least Sasha was the golden opportunity, she’d turn the tides in his favor.

\------

Rapey fucking Davey. That fucking asshole.

Negan saw people’s expressions changing as word got round. Another one bit the dust, Negan being the one who did it. He basked in the afterglow of killing someone that really deserved it, he wore it triumphantly. The fear in their eyes gave him some sense of control.

Bastard broke the rules so he faced the consequences.

“You uh—you left her with your knife,” one of Negan’s men asked.

“You have a set of eyes don’t you,” Negan bit back. “Told her she could keep it if she wanted but I’m taking it back. She’ll give it willingly.” He grinned, licking his lips.

There was that bad taste in his mouth. A fucking rapist under his radar and it took until now for him to notice? Fuck’s sake.  

“What are you doing standing there,” Negan growled at his men, “I promised the woman a new shirt, we can’t have her thinking we’re fucking animals! Get her things. Make her comfortable, god damnit!” He started walking briskly down the corridor, tapping Lucille on the guardrails, people trembling in his wake. “Good for nothing shits,” he grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

The noise followed him wherever he’d go.

The banging echoed in his head, waking him from his brief stint at sleep. 

Sasha said yes, he got his knife like he thought he would and she fucking said yes.

“It’s showtime,” he mouthed to himself. He strolled on over to her cell, lingering for a moment, pacing side to side as one of his men watched him.

_Where’s that game face?_

He had his entrance planned out in his head, the light would shine through behind him like a spotlight…like a beacon of hope. Her lord and savior, blah, blah, blah.

There wasn’t time to catch his breath. As soon and the door was wide open, Negan’s eyes grew saucer wide. His shadow was cast over her form. She was face down, not moving.

She had to be unconscious. Maybe there wasn’t enough air in the cell and she passed out. Or she could have been claustrophobic, he didn’t know. Plenty of reasons were going through his head outside of the obvious. The obvious being that she was dead, and hadn’t turned yet.

He turned her over.

“No,” Simon came up from behind, trying to grab Negan, “You nuts? She could be…”

She hadn’t turned. At least she wasn’t doing anything now that he was looking right at her. “Shut up we gotta do something. Get the doctor. He’ll know what to do.”

His men were stunned, staring at Negan clutching at her. They weren’t moving so he shouted. “You heard me you fucks! Get the doctor!”

Simon stayed, he looked uneasy but Negan didn’t have time to notice. He pulled off his glove and put his hand under her nose. Nothing. Two fingers felt for a pulse, nothing.

“Buddy, she is gone. She is fucking gone,” Simon nodded his head side to side. “I hate to be the guy to tell you…”

“Shut up,” Negan growled, “How the fuck could she die? Under my watch? No fucking way. Shit like that doesn’t even happen.” He got on his knees, gently tilting her head back and put both his hands on her chest.

“What are you doing,” Simon intervened, Negan shoved him away. “Fucking Christ, if you think of putting your mouth near hers…”

“She’s not ice cold. I don’t think she’s been unconscious for long,” he pushed at her diaphragm, then pinched her nose, breathing air into her mouth. He did it again, counting to himself, hoping she’d spring to life.

“You are fucking pushing it god damnit,” Simon slicked his hair back, pacing back and forth. “It’s not fucking happening.”

“C’mon doll, you gotta do this for me okay,” Negan said underneath his breath to her. His palms were sweating and he tried one last time, pushing onto her, his mouth on hers, breathing right into airway. Down the hall he could hear the doctor coming closer, along with the murmurs with his other men.

Right, like he was fucking crazy? No way was he crazy. For a split second he was distracted when he noticed her eyes looking right into his.

Everything moved in slow motion, when he moved just enough, the light caught her eyes, they weren’t brown anymore, they were white. Panic set in right as she was going to lunge at him. Simon thought fast, he grabbed him by the back of his jacket, pulling him out of the way as he stood over her, shooting one bullet right between her eyes.

And that was it.

She fell back, the dark red blood spreading across the floor.

All he could see was Lucille, he could hear her, smell her, taste the iron of biting his own tongue in absolute fear. She was brought to life and killed again right before his own eyes.

“Shit, honey, no,” he heard himself say.


End file.
